The Heavyweight Podcast
Welcome to *The Heavyweight Podcast*, where every week, a dynamic group of four—“this lady and these three guys”—come together to discuss a wide range of topics that both warm the heart and nourish the soul. The Heavyweight Podcast brings together four unique individuals, each with their own perspective, to engage in open and honest conversations about real-life situations. Whether you're in need of a good laugh to release some tension or you're seeking real answers to life’s tough questions, tune in to *The Heavyweight Podcast*. Whatever you're looking for, you’ll find it here.
The Heavyweight Podcast
Ask Us Roulette
What does freedom really look like for Americans in 2025? On this week’s episode of The Heavyweight Podcast, we’re taking the gloves off to talk truth about identity, culture, dating, and the pressure to unlearn what no longer serves us.
🔥 Cultural Influence vs. Representation:
From braids and locks to slang and sound, we examine the difference between being celebrated and being copied. Why are Black styles embraced on non-Black bodies but labeled “unprofessional” when worn by us? This discussion peels back the layers of cultural appropriation, demanding we look deeper than surface trends.
💘 Dating Standards & Social Media Myths:
One host keeps it all the way real with: “If I’m into you, I want to be where you at. I don’t give a damn where it’s at.” 🙌 That raw truth leads to a refreshing critique of materialism, clout-chasing, and the viral nonsense that’s misrepresenting what real women want in relationships.
🧠 Breaking Generational Cycles:
We go deep into healing, parenting, and learning to see value in yourself before chasing validation from others. From betrayal to accountability, the conversation turns powerful, shedding light on how we can stop repeating what hurt us—and raise the next generation differently.
As always, expect unfiltered honesty, bold perspectives, and some laughs to keep it light. Whether you're here for the cultural convo, relationship realness, or emotional growth, this episode is one you won’t want to miss.
Welcome to the Heavyweight Podcast.
Speaker 2:The message behind saying the title of the Heavyweight Podcast is to be able to say that we can weigh in on some heavy shit. What we're talking about is important from every aspect of it. It's a heavy weight. It's not just about physical weight, but the weight of things that can weigh our minds. So I think it's dope that we can have this conversation.
Speaker 3:Yeah, can we call that pumpkin trumpkin ah, yes, it does look like him, that's funny okay, okay is a hell of a drug then stop doing it
Speaker 5:how you think I lost that weight.
Speaker 4:What's up, everybody? It's your girl Dance the Diva. Back with another episode of the Heavyweight Podcast.
Speaker 5:Yay, yay.
Speaker 4:I'm back here today with these three gentlemen and this beautiful lady returning to visiting as a guest star here with us. Everybody introduce yourself.
Speaker 1:I'm Kevin Wendell Ellis.
Speaker 5:I'm just the nigga to the right of dance.
Speaker 4:Period.
Speaker 2:I'm some random guy they call McFly.
Speaker 3:My favorite and I'll go with Miss Lady.
Speaker 4:And Miss Lady. How was everybody's week Good?
Speaker 1:Interesting, interesting, interesting. How. I don't know if I can say a whole lot, but we'll see. I'll know more next week.
Speaker 4:Okay.
Speaker 1:You know how Dr Dre fucked up when he had that apple shit yeah.
Speaker 4:Okay, what about you Mo?
Speaker 5:It's cool. Life, the life of the life.
Speaker 4:Always Okay, I hear you.
Speaker 5:Always. You know, shit just costs money.
Speaker 4:Everything costs money, everything I will say this.
Speaker 5:I found out the reason why I can't get a truck this year. This is why I can't get a truck.
Speaker 4:Okay, why?
Speaker 5:Because I pay $10,000 a year for gymnastics.
Speaker 4:Damn, that's all right. Baby girl going all the way, it's going to pay off. She's going to buy a nice big house and a nice truck.
Speaker 5:So all y'all out there keep asking when I'm going to have another one. I can't fucking afford another one, so stop asking. Well, because I still got to feed it. That don't include to feed it. I was going to say the odds of being in the same sport is low.
Speaker 4:You're going to stop paying my girl like she eat a lot Because they're both in gymnastics here, and one's good, the other is like you're having fun. Your kids. Are you talking about your kids?
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, you got to be honest.
Speaker 5:And Des. Just so you know that girl ate a half a pot of chicken noodle soup. Yesterday, Damn Was the puppy?
Speaker 2:Did she have a soda on the side?
Speaker 5:No, no, but she wanted one. Mom, can I have a poppy Aww?
Speaker 4:No.
Speaker 5:Get your ass some water. Yeah, that's it. Life is lifin'. Shit costs money and no oxtails. Can't afford them.
Speaker 4:He said I ain't even on the oxtail bracket right now. I'm about to start selling dick for oxtails. You still won't be able to afford them. Mcfly Shit, I can drop it off. Quality dick how was your week? Shit. How was your week? Mcfly Huh? How was your week?
Speaker 2:I got to go after that.
Speaker 4:Yep, you dropping off quality dick too. Yeah that, just just just living, just living, just living. We missed you. Are you living life like it's golden, living my life like living my life?
Speaker 5:and I'm hoeing. Hey, you ain't talking.
Speaker 4:We ain't got to your weekend.
Speaker 2:Let's calm down let's get the details, let's go ahead, let's get your week.
Speaker 1:That's, that's fine what about you?
Speaker 3:I'm not in these streets hoeing, but I had a good week.
Speaker 4:I ain't really in the streets hoeing either. I'm not really. Yeah, you hoeing the bedroom. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not in these streets hoeing, but I had a good week. I ain't really in the streets hoeing either. I'm not really in the streets. Yeah, you hoeing the bedroom. I'm not in there hoeing either. We've already discussed this. When I get elderly and the teeth come out, that's when I'll be out there living my life and I'm hoeing gonna get you a sponsorship. I'm gonna be out there making money and not letting them make me.
Speaker 3:Only fans Show your feet.
Speaker 4:You niggas buy feet pictures out here. Did you see what I? You niggas purchase feet pictures.
Speaker 5:Did you see the video I sent you earlier this week?
Speaker 2:I haven't yeah.
Speaker 5:The nigga said Only Fans is fucking up the game because these girls want GoPro. They won't go for a porn star because they only fit my feet.
Speaker 4:Ain't no need to. Anytime a nigga want to purchase a toe, they don't need to go.
Speaker 5:I'm going to put my feet up, go on a knee finder they all say that too they absolutely can tell
Speaker 4:tell the tax man, I know your feet look like you can dip it in the water and catch dinner.
Speaker 1:I know it do didn't they find out how that shit work? They, uncle Sam, said hey, oh, you ain't gonna find it, don't worry, we get it.
Speaker 4:Anyway, these questions were cultivated by you guys. I put a request out there for everybody to send in their questions so we can play a little game of question roulette and you guys deliver. So thank everybody for doing that. I have one question in particular.
Speaker 5:I want y'all to know that she took the time off to type these shits up. Did, print them out, did, and then cut them Did, did. Indeed, she put a lot more effort. I would have had a list.
Speaker 1:I don't have no children. I have to slide my arts and crafts in. She loves arts and crafts.
Speaker 4:I know, you fucking had, and they're hating on my shoes again.
Speaker 3:Your shoes are fucking lame shoes again.
Speaker 4:You know the thing about it is it's just real hard to be a bad bitch in a room full of regular niggas.
Speaker 5:The shoes today are actually kind of nice though.
Speaker 4:These shoes are fire.
Speaker 2:I like these shoes. Thank you very much. You're sort of animal.
Speaker 4:Thank you very much. I'm regular every day.
Speaker 2:No, I'm never a regular bitch. I'm never a regular bitch.
Speaker 5:The thing is this okay.
Speaker 4:It's hard to be a bad bitch in a room for the niggas that just want you to be fucking regular.
Speaker 2:I just don't want my bitch killed in the process, that's all fuck you.
Speaker 5:McFly, I'll get you a credit.
Speaker 4:Though, dad, you be trying to coordinate, I'll be coordinate, listen your girl be on, okay, and listen. I set a trend for the other big bitches that's just what it is other big bitches hold on nigga. I set a trend for the other big bitches. Okay, the other big bitches come, they see, they say okay, this bitch, she put that shit on, put that shit on too. Then they feel confident.
Speaker 5:So now y'all can't make jokes about the other big bitches, but you should do that, though. What was you going to say, are you?
Speaker 2:conflicted with all the memes and pictures of Muppets going around, since you, in fact killed Muppets?
Speaker 1:She's not at all. She's like ooh, that makes some good shit. It sure the fuck will, it sure the fuck will.
Speaker 4:All y'all do is make me think of what can I wear. That's the next craziest thing. That was crazier than the last thing I wore before and get out here and set a trend, because that's exactly what happens.
Speaker 1:I like it, do it.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I'll be hating on it, be yourself, be original, fuck what people say.
Speaker 1:Oh Lord.
Speaker 5:This nigga's high again. Shut up, McFly.
Speaker 4:Snuff-a-luck-us, oh Snuff-a-luck-us.
Speaker 5:Oh well, you got everything you need. On Sesame Street, you had pimps, hoes oh my God, crack heads.
Speaker 4:Who was the pimp? The Count? All right, we're going to go ahead and start off. The Count was the pimp. Take a question.
Speaker 3:You had a gay couple? He probably was.
Speaker 4:He got the cereal too, Then that cereal was kind of cracking you had a gay couple down there.
Speaker 3:Okay, this is from Terry. What are your thoughts on the?
Speaker 4:illusion that we are free and the belief that Blacks are the minority in the country. I came here for you.
Speaker 2:Thank you, terry Wait what so Terry wants to?
Speaker 4:know what is your thoughts on the illusion that we live in a free life and that Blacks are the minority in this country Is that what you're asking.
Speaker 1:Is that an illusion?
Speaker 4:It is an illusion. It is definitely an illusion. You think we're free now.
Speaker 1:No, about Blacks being minorities. We definitely not.
Speaker 4:But it's a two-part question. So the first part of the question is what's your thought of the illusion that we're free Like? Do you believe that we're free? Do you believe it's an illusion? What are your thoughts on that? And then the second part of the question is listened to my dad.
Speaker 3:Black people definitely are, only free to a degree, because there's a stigma attached to the African-American culture and then as far as us being the minority absolutely not Hispanics are coming through because if you really think about it, if you sat down at a welfare office right now and I walked in and a Hispanic person that basically has nothing and they have kids here, they're going to get benefits.
Speaker 3:Before I do as far as like welfare, and everything else so but I say that we are not the minority because I feel like that culture is coming through and taking up all the resources educationally, financially, across the board.
Speaker 4:That's just my opinion. I don't think we're the minority. I definitely think we're the majority and I think we're the blueprint and I think that we are what sets the trend. I do want to be just touch base on something you just said. Although you are a light-skinned woman, when they see you, they see a nigga. They don't think you white. Is that what a you? Or a I? This a nigga? So what a you? Nigga? In two fucking K's. They don't see you and see a white woman Because, of course, black women have the Eve genes.
Speaker 4:So we really don't know until you tell us if you have a white parent or if you're just one of the miraculous black Black woman got born in that period, one of the miraculous black people that come from all the beautiful things that we can create as black people, but nobody sees you and thinks this is a white woman. They see you and be like that's a nigga. So the same things that will possibly, could possibly happen to me could also possibly happen to you, true? Yes, mcfly, what you think? You think we're the minority.
Speaker 4:In terms of minority, and what clarification I assume that he means like it's less of us. That's how I took it. Like is it less of us? Are we the bottom of the barrel? That's how I took it. Like is it less of us? Are we the bottom of the barrel? That's how I took it. I didn't speak to him on the phone so I don't know, but that's how I took it.
Speaker 2:I think, in the frame of what they want us to be perceived as. Yes, I feel like I guess it's a combination of what you said we're a minority, to a degree only by their status, what you said we're a minority to a degree only by their status. But we are the. We are the trendsetters of what this country thrives off of. If we're not here, they don't have much of a culture.
Speaker 4:Absolutely, absolutely Across the board. They barely got salt and pepper Period Across the board and I'm glad you said that because that ties into the question that I said I was going to automatically ask. It ties into that. I'm glad you said that. What about you guys? What do you think?
Speaker 1:I'm like having good, I mean you got his glasses.
Speaker 5:When I hear minority.
Speaker 1:I think minority numbers yeah, yeah so that's what it is.
Speaker 2:It's like.
Speaker 1:what the fuck else are you asking? That would be influence. That's not a number to me. Yeah, so yes, what about the first part that we're free? You feel free, I didn't answer that. I feel free in my own sense, yeah, hmm, so Okay, I feel like you have to allow yourself to either be constrained or Be confined, I don't know. Be free.
Speaker 4:Do you feel free, McFly.
Speaker 2:I think it's in the terms of what they want or allow us to be. I mean, it's all perspective you can feel free and what your parameters are of free. But I don't think anyone's truthfully 100 percent free.
Speaker 4:I think we're learning with this current administration that none of us are free, unless you got some money. And even they are, you know confining to someone else, and even they are you know, confining to someone else. So let me ask you because and I'm asking you this because I noticed that a lot of times when we, when we have cultural questions, you mention your light skin. Do you feel free?
Speaker 3:No, and I think the thing is I'm glad you brought that up because it's I'm like on that like pole, like dividing pole. There are people that look at me as a Black woman, but there are some people that bring up the fact that I'm biracial and I shouldn't be tapping into the culture because I'm only half white and half Black. And so for me again, I was raised by a Black father who basically lets me know about all the stigmatization that comes along with being an African-American. I think everybody here makes a valid point, but I would have to agree to a degree we are not free. To a degree we are not.
Speaker 4:I want you to hold on horn in on that. Um, what you just mentioned about being biracial, when we get to this question as well, okay, because I heard something else she.
Speaker 5:She said it right okay.
Speaker 2:You made a face.
Speaker 5:I'm sorry, I just heard something else. What'd you hear?
Speaker 2:I'm not going to repeat it, something with horn, I'm assuming I said hone in.
Speaker 3:Hone not horn day.
Speaker 5:It was this. It was this, it was this.
Speaker 4:What'd I say, hone in?
Speaker 2:You thought you said horny, or what.
Speaker 4:Living my life, saying I'm hone in. I would just say, what'd I say?
Speaker 5:How we in you thought you said horny or what, living my life paying them home with me. I would just say that Black people like Kevin I agree with Kevin Numbers wise we're a minority, we don't outnumber them at all, but that doesn't mean that we are a minority as far as numbers, but we are the majority as far as culture, absolutely.
Speaker 4:Absolutely Not Minority as far as numbers, but we are the majority as far as culture, absolutely, absolutely. Not you.
Speaker 5:Everything black is imitated and duplicated and they try to whitewash it.
Speaker 1:Get that, but that's influence. That's why I don't go off that question.
Speaker 4:Okay, we're not going to put another question just yet. I'm going to actually ask this question, can I? Yeah, go ahead, go ahead, go ahead, let them cook.
Speaker 5:Go ahead. Can I finish? Go ahead. I don't believe that we are free. I think we're free within the constructs of the system, of the limit of freedom that the system provides, but we're still part of the system, and so, since we can't operate outside the system freely without being punished by the system, then we're not free.
Speaker 4:And I agree. But I think everybody is part of the system. There's just levels to the system.
Speaker 5:No, this nigga's outside the system.
Speaker 4:Who outside the system? Trump.
Speaker 5:No, he ain't outside the system.
Speaker 4:He a puppet like everybody else, because they already told him what's her name.
Speaker 2:Crockett yeah, you want to get this hand off, baby.
Speaker 4:And Jasmine Crockett told him to stop being Putin's hoe. Oh, being Putin's hoe. Oh, my God, I love her.
Speaker 5:I want to see Jasmine in a sundress.
Speaker 4:Me too, jasmine, and if you see this, wear a sundress, baby Shit, because definitely definitely love Jasmine. You know, jasmine Perkins Mm-hmm, that's a bad bitch. She is. That's a bad bitch. I'm going to ask this question because it actually ties into what kind of that's a lot of words.
Speaker 4:The answer I got from you, you, you and you, because this girl didn't ask. First of all, this question is from Candace. Candace, done, asked me this question more than once, but she is not the only white woman to ask me this shit this week. So I'm going to ask this question so that our white women viewers that keep asking me the same question can hear the answer. I really am interested in what your answer is, because she does want to know about mixed race as well. You're gonna answer no, I was gonna answer a question.
Speaker 4:I thought that was anyway, and I feel like you probably got something interesting to say too. Okay, so this is a long question, but this is what she asked. She wants to know, in a world full of diversity even with people that are trying to wipe the diversity out and blended and mixed cultures, what exactly is considered cultural appropriation and what is considered embracing the culture. For example, she says can a white woman have braids, dreads or locks yes, they're called locks With gems and jewels, because she loves the look and it makes her feel confident, or is that considered appropriation? She wants to know. Does the answer change if you have Black children or if you are mixed race yourself?
Speaker 2:Let me, what is it? Go ahead.
Speaker 3:Go ahead, do you?
Speaker 2:need clarification. I just want to know what happened to black children.
Speaker 5:We're going to get there because I'm going to answer that Because the black children gives them association.
Speaker 3:It gives them the right to pass. That's what it is.
Speaker 5:They think because they're a white person with black children, they're associated to the black community because their kids are part of a community.
Speaker 4:And that's where you hear the most people say a nigga. And then they say, well, I'm not racist because my kids is black. Well, baby, you can't say nigga with a motherfucking rock, you can't say it with a fox nigga. You can't say it here, you can't say it there.
Speaker 3:All right, Dr Sue. So I want to chime in on that and kind of piggyback on what you're saying.
Speaker 4:And let me be, candace is actually a really sweet woman and she do not mean no harm at all. I really think that she just is trying to find her way in a world where people, where it's hard for her to just figure out, like what's appropriate, what can I say, what can I do. I literally had another woman ask me this week could she wear a bonnet as a white woman or would that be girl? I said cover up your damn hair, girl. Your hair is fucking Cover your hair up.
Speaker 5:Shit, it's not a problem. Does she have dry scalp? If she does not, then no you so goddamn angry. The issue becomes I'm gatekeeping everything black.
Speaker 4:Appropriation and a problem for me when we, as black women, had to have a law passed to be able to wear our hair how it naturally grows outside of our head. Be able to wear our hair how it naturally grows outside of our head, be able to wear braids to work. You don't see a lot of.
Speaker 5:Let me catch a black woman with a fur on a sundress.
Speaker 4:My God, you don't see a lot of news anchors and the people in the public eye with braids in their hair. We have to have a law passed and then Kim Kardashian gets her ass up there and calls them boxer braids, and then it's the most beautiful thing ever. That's where the issue comes in, when we're told our big behinds and our very voluptuous figures are unattractive and animalistic if you will. But then when a white woman go get a bbl, it's the sexiest thing you ever seen. That's where the appropriation comes in.
Speaker 4:It's okay for you to want to wear braids if you, that's your thing. If you just needed me to braid your hair, baby, next time, next time you're in California, just call me, I'll get you right. But when it comes to a point where us, as the culture that are creating these amazing things, are getting put down, it's even down to rap. They're telling rappers oh, don't rap about this, don't rap about that, you're this, you're that, you're ghetto, you're this and that, this, your that, your ghetto, your this and that. And then Eminem pops up and he's the greatest white rapper ever.
Speaker 2:I love Eminem and I'm not dissing him no.
Speaker 4:Eminem. Bashing will be tolerated, However. But I'm just saying this is a white man and they embraced it and they accepted it, but when it's black people, it's a problem. That's where the issue comes in for me.
Speaker 5:Marshall did not appropriate.
Speaker 4:I didn't say he did, but what I'm saying is he was more welcome and accepted than a lot of other black rappers. He had skill. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter because, at the end of the day, for me, yes, he does have skill. I'm going to take it away from his skill, but what I'm saying is it's a bunch of motherfucking rappers right now underground I can name you a good 15 of them that got skill and probably a little bit more skill than his ass, but they embraced him. They embraced him. They. He talked about his hood, his ghetto, his lifestyle, whatever. And it was not one time saying oh, this is ghetto, that he's saying these things. They embraced the fact. Oh my god, marshall, this is what he went through, but when it's us doing it, it's a problem. That's where the appropriation comes in. I couldn't wait to answer this one, candace Girl. Thank you.
Speaker 3:So I like how Ma was saying earlier as going into that there's no problem for anybody white, Black, Hispanic, anybody to wear braids, locks. If that's what you want to rock it, rock it. If that's part of who you feel like you are, rock it. It shouldn't matter. There should not be a stigma attached with how you present yourself as long as you're appropriate. But what I have seen is where you do see white women, Hispanic women, women that are not Black, because they do have biracial kids, feel like they can act out of context and unfortunately that's when they start trying to diminish the Black culture because that's what they see and so they try to replicate that, because that's what they feel it is is acceptable. And again, having biracial kids does not give you a pass to act culturally biased in my opinion, Absolutely and it does not give you a pass to certain things like I don't care if you have 10 black kids, If you're a white woman.
Speaker 3:Don't say the N-word, don't say that that does not give you the right. Don't show up to a barbecue hitting the side of your head talking about oh and this and that, no, we're not doing that.
Speaker 4:Because that's not being Black, no, that's being stereotypical.
Speaker 3:Correct, and that's where I think the culture has that fine line. You have people who are white, hispanic, who love the Black culture, who don't go outside of that, and then you have the stereotypical part, and so I just for me, be who you're going to be, but if you feel like you want to take it a notch up, represent the African-American culture appropriately.
Speaker 4:Exactly. And it goes back to say and this is not Candace at all, because, candace, I hadn't even seen that lady date a Black man. I don't know if she dated Black men or not. I don't never seen that lady date a black man. I don't know if she date black men or not, I don't know. But I feel the same way when it comes to women that are dating black men. If you're going to take some black dick, I need you to take some black issues as well. When that man is going through it, you try to understand his issues as well. That's an issue for me too, because I feel like as soon as the going get tough for the black man you run, they come right back to us who they left. So I gotta lord, I'm gonna get canceled. Let me shut the fuck somebody else before I get canceled, because I'll have to go on a rampage.
Speaker 2:Somebody help to get uh, to answer the question, I I feel like, if you're it's, I feel like it doesn't become cultural appropriation if you're understanding where it comes from and paying respect to where it comes from and you represent it accordingly, as far as, if you like, dreads, braids, etc.
Speaker 3:You understand Locks. Please, please, please, Thank you locks.
Speaker 2:Please, please, please, thank you.
Speaker 2:Anyway, if you like any of these hairstyles, understand where they come from, pay homage to respect. I don't think it's necessarily appropriate and if you're just saying that you understand where it comes from and you're rocking it because you like the hairstyle. But I think it has been a lot of cultural appropriation, especially in our society and entertainment, because they'll highlight the braids, locks, et cetera by people and then act as if they don't know where it came from. So you'll see it on television and you're like, what the fuck? And they will, oh yeah, so-and-so, rock this and it's like, but you're not even given the proper credit to where it came from. You're just making it seem like the first time you ever seen this representation of braids or whatever was on people of different colors. So, uh, from my understanding it's if you're gonna, if you're gonna do it and you like the hairstyle, candace, by all means, rock it, but just understand and respect where it came from I agree, that's well said I was just trying to get back on track because you, you guys, stuck out.
Speaker 2:You made it something else. I was like goddamn, I'm lost.
Speaker 4:Somebody will me back in because I'm about to go on a rampage. Do y'all have anything to?
Speaker 1:say Nothing. I agree with McClary. I said go with your heart. Yeah, don't do that you know.
Speaker 1:I can't agree. Force somebody to do something they ain't gonna do. If they gonna show you who they are, then let them be who they are. That's what it is like. I don't know why we make it such a thing where it's like, if you're asking for understanding, I get that, but if you're asking because you think you're doing it and I'm not saying that's what she's doing, then you already know where your heart's at. So it's like I don't need to like cut the bullshit out, I don't need it. It's answered. That's how I see it. I like this, kevin what's in that cup?
Speaker 4:tequila, tequila, kevin. Okay, thank you, candace, that was a great question and we did go on a rampage, but you got multiple answers out of us. What is this we?
Speaker 2:Yeah, that was y'all.
Speaker 4:Is this not a we?
Speaker 2:In that moment it was not.
Speaker 4:I turned and said we Went on a rampage One more time.
Speaker 2:One more time. Friend, I said we, I don't give a damn and we got. Friend, I said it. Some people didn't know you were Eminem in the chat.
Speaker 4:I don't give a damn.
Speaker 1:And we got cut.
Speaker 4:I don't care, and I like Eminem. I do. I think he's a great rapper.
Speaker 5:What about you, like Marshall?
Speaker 4:Ain't that the same nigga?
Speaker 5:Well Slim.
Speaker 4:Same nigga San and all of them niggas, same nigga. You want to put the questions? No, I don't why you're such an asshole I don't feel like reading here.
Speaker 1:We'll put it right there I'm not reading shit.
Speaker 4:I'm not reading shit well, this one you can answer, since you answered it online already. This one's for Marcus, and Marcus wants to know where does beauty begin?
Speaker 5:what then wants to know where does?
Speaker 4:beauty begin. But then and then he wanted to know I don't forgot what else, what he else he said, because he said then, what did he ask you? Answer the damn question the man asked you online, I don't remember. He says beauty is from within.
Speaker 1:Everybody agree, yeah it starts at the heart.
Speaker 3:Same shit everything starts at the heart you could be fine as all get out and have an ugly ass soul.
Speaker 4:I don't think beauty is tied to how you look physically, it's about how you treat people. I think it's totally tied to how you treat people. And I say that because I've been physically attracted to people, because they're so sweet and the way that they move, and then they piss me off, and then they say they're damn cute, them all.
Speaker 5:I mean men say all the time Men say all the time sweet and the way that they move, and then they piss me off. Then they can say they're damn cute to me. Men say all the time you understand, we can be attracted to personality.
Speaker 2:That's beautiful within. I just wish more people understood that.
Speaker 1:I also could see somebody and be like, as long as she don't talk, we cool.
Speaker 5:I smashed a six with great personality, over a ten any day.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, I will say that I've seen in a lot of instances.
Speaker 5:But I got a 10 at home, so I don't care.
Speaker 2:In a lot of instances I've seen where a woman that I didn't necessarily find attractive in the beginning started talking and her personality came out and you're like, oh, I get it. Yeah, I get it, I completely get it. The personality will win me over every time. So I, I get it, I completely get it, the personality will win me over every time I get it.
Speaker 4:Okay. Okay, John wants to know, not hating daddy, but John wants to know why is it so hard for Mexican men to get and date black women?
Speaker 5:I don't think it's hard at all.
Speaker 3:Is that hard, baby, you don't watch the show, baby baby, you don't watch the show.
Speaker 4:Cause when that deuce from the south was on this motherfucker here, baby.
Speaker 5:I'm saying is it?
Speaker 2:cause. I didn't see that on here at all is.
Speaker 5:John Mexican he is. This is not a Mexican man problem, this is a John problem. Got to be baby cause when deuce from the south.
Speaker 4:Look what then? And that other one from See?
Speaker 2:that's kind of hard to say, because if that's the person you say, all John needs is a ponytail like that.
Speaker 4:Yeah, baby, put that shit in a bun and it's done.
Speaker 2:Baby, I'm letting you know, right now okay, John, get a ponytail on some tattoos.
Speaker 4:My inbox went crazy when they was on here. So I'm like you know right now they could definitely get it. What? If he's balding no. I don't think he's balding, he's actually a handsome man he went to high school with us. I'll tell you who it is after.
Speaker 2:To be fair, the videos I've sent you, those new men with laces it's possible I can do them, so if you want one, I can do them.
Speaker 5:So if you want one, I can get the glue. I'm going to just show it one day with a Gumby, I can do them.
Speaker 4:I can do them. So if you want one, I got you.
Speaker 3:Then I'm going to put it like this.
Speaker 4:I got you.
Speaker 1:It's possible, anything's possible, john.
Speaker 4:No, honestly.
Speaker 5:I think it's you All I say get your swag up. You gotta have swag to deal with black women. Absolutely, you can't out. There be copying paste and dry.
Speaker 1:You gotta find somebody. Dog, you just keep shooting at the ones that don't want you. It's cool.
Speaker 5:No, the ones he want, he needs swag.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but they.
Speaker 5:He can get the emo black girl. No problem, you right.
Speaker 2:But you know what Did you say? The emo, yeah, I think you're right. Does he wear the same hair stuff for the no, it's the the little.
Speaker 4:Yeah, my life, you wait, okay, wait, wait, remember, remember you told me, you remember, you told me you see somebody and they told you that they knew me a couple of weeks ago it's him, oh, it's him.
Speaker 3:So yeah, you get the emo girl, you get the head on the nail you did, he didn. He ain't getting no ponytail though.
Speaker 1:He not getting, no, no.
Speaker 3:He ain't getting no ponytail he, so he ain't getting no ponytail.
Speaker 4:You not going to get the same women that Doocy Scrappy get.
Speaker 5:See, the thing is, this is what I personally love about black women. Black women are not all the same. Right there, there's literally a different shade of black women. You can get 10 different shades, 10 different hairstyles, 10 different personalities, 10 different sets of interests. You just got to find the one. You probably just not the ones you attracted to. They just not attracted to you. That means you got to step your swagger.
Speaker 4:Yes, yes, this is true. I don't believe in swag Shit you just ain't going to get the same ones that dudes from the South can get you. I don't believe in swag Shit.
Speaker 2:You just saying I'm going to get the same ones that dudes from the South and Scrappy G get, but you can get you a little. I don't call it swag.
Speaker 5:What you got? What'd you call it? What'd you call it Me?
Speaker 2:It's swag. Swag is about confidence. I hate the word swag, okay.
Speaker 5:It's about confidence. Okay, sometimes I take the cool out of my walk and I'm still the coolest person in the room. I see, that's what you get Period, Okay period. You said cool nigga. Now I thought about you taking out a pack of cools out your pocket. It's been a while.
Speaker 3:It's been a while.
Speaker 4:This is from.
Speaker 3:Sharif, can men be both hood and a gentleman, or does one identity cancel out the other?
Speaker 4:You can be both. Yes, for sure, I like a good hood gentleman. To be honest with you, them the ones that I be looking for. Here's the thing.
Speaker 5:Here's the thing you can be hood when dealing with personal problems and personal situations, but then when you come home to your lady, you a gentleman. Yes, yes, your lady is the one place when you come home to your lady, you, a gentleman, yes, yes, your lady is the one place where you're supposed to be soft.
Speaker 1:I'm going to say this Don't be only hood.
Speaker 2:if you're from the hood, nigga Like if you didn't grow up that way, you know what I mean, though I don't.
Speaker 1:Some niggas want to pretend to be a certain way, and it's like don't.
Speaker 4:This man is probably the most. I know him too. This is probably he. I can't even explain.
Speaker 5:Like Kendrick. When Kendrick named them high schools, he pissed a lot of people off. Say that shit. When he named them high schools, yeah. Because I know what he was talking about. At the end of the day, that's hood, yeah.
Speaker 1:He's from there, he is there.
Speaker 4:You know man is. Personally, I think he is the epitome of someone who previously had a hood mentality and has all the way turned his swag up to a complete gentleman.
Speaker 5:Complete respectful man, but my question is exactly what you consider to be hood? Yeah, that's what I'm saying, because you got people who grew up in the hood, that grew up to be professional and they don't. They're not.
Speaker 3:There's nothing about them that's stereotypical.
Speaker 1:Shout out to Ryan Coogler professional, and they don't. They're not. There's nothing about them. That's stereotypical to me. I think that makes you still hood.
Speaker 2:Center is you're up there, because to me, when you start talking like that, you're starting. The movie centers michael b jordan, the director you don't see how hood he is, but he's very professional no, but I'm a google I think, I think we're making a stereotype going off what kevin said, I think I associate hood with A stereotype.
Speaker 5:Not a stereotype, it's just a mentality, because, like, it's just your set, because everybody know, in certain neighborhoods you got to have a certain rules of survival, so you just carry those with you. That don't mean you act like a stereotype. You just know the rules. Like I know, when I'm in certain places, my head's on the floor, I can't relax.
Speaker 4:Yeah relax, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:So I mean, yeah, I just when I hear that, it seems like that's how people.
Speaker 4:All right, I'm not gonna ask nothing that's fucking shit.
Speaker 2:I didn't say anything.
Speaker 4:I hadn't said anything you wanted me to answer questions. Yeah, I wasn't gonna interrupt you.
Speaker 2:Okay, I'm just saying um, I personally feel like because a lot of the dudes that I knew that grew up in the hood it was a difference between you can still to me convey hood, like he says hood understanding because you're trying to survive. But I think the the whole thing is what you're trying to do with it. Are you trying to progress out of this? Are you stuck in that mentality so you can have, you can approach certain things with a hood understanding because that was the way you survived, but at the end of the day, day yeah, what are you trying to do with this? Are you trying to stay stuck in the hood or are you trying to get out of it?
Speaker 5:It's the epitome of street smarts and book smarts.
Speaker 3:My dad grew up on the east side of Riverside. He knows what it's like to be poor. But if you look at where he's at right now, circumstantially he lives and owns his house because he rose above what he wanted to. And again it's about mentality you either stay stagnant or you rise above it, and again, there's nothing wrong with having that hoodness in you if it's built within you. But again, doing dual roles is definitely feasible, possible and happens all the time. You have people that will be in these streets doing some shit and go home to their families like they didn't do anything, because they know how to multitask and balance.
Speaker 1:If you're in the streets doing some shit, then you ain't going to balance it that long.
Speaker 3:No, I know. But, there are people that do that every day.
Speaker 1:It depends on the shit you're doing, that's what I'm saying.
Speaker 3:But when you say doing some shit, I, I'm saying, but when you say, doing some, shit, I'm taking that as moving away.
Speaker 1:You're doing some shit. You know what I mean.
Speaker 3:Yeah, Gang banging Eventually, that runs the fuck out.
Speaker 5:No you're right Smoking that smoke Gang banging yeah.
Speaker 4:That was the worst song I ever made in history. That's the greatest song. I love Smokey alone.
Speaker 5:He is a national treasure that nigga did the most Sipping that wine.
Speaker 2:Because it's all about trying to get better. Because I know a lot of dudes that I grew up with that are in prison for life dead, and you wouldn't think that I grew up around them but my dad went out of his way to raise me to stay the fuck away from it and not necessarily believe that that was the thing to idolize. And a lot of friends I knew idolized like minister society. Yeah, they looked at that shit and said that's what they want to be and I'm like there's no future. Yeah, so I just know I stayed away from it, but when you talk to me you'll never think that that that was my upbringing. You just I just understood that the whole point was to get the fuck out of it. So if you keep that as a Sharif, keep that mentality, man, just believe that you're trying to do better and what you're doing better, for ain't nothing wrong with coming from there. Just don't stay stuck in it.
Speaker 5:Like 100. And when the nigga that see you trying to do better ask you if you think you better than them, just say no, I'm just more motivated.
Speaker 4:Period.
Speaker 2:See, I would've said Go ahead and say it. I would say yeah If they asked me that and if they had the nerve to ask me yes, I think I'm better than you.
Speaker 1:I might not say that I'd be like I'm better than this shit though, or better than I was yesterday. Yeah, I'm not this shit.
Speaker 5:This don't define me, sorry, because the niggas with the hood mentality will see you trying to progress as a sign of you thinking you're superior. I'm superior just better than I was.
Speaker 1:Some do some don't Some do.
Speaker 4:yeah, Not all of them, but some do.
Speaker 5:But that's the insecurity thing, I think. Oh, most definitely.
Speaker 4:Well, Damn Well, Candace wants to know God damn. We back with Candace. This is her last question. We're going to start charging Candace, Because Candace your question.
Speaker 2:She gets the discount because she went to North.
Speaker 4:Yes, and she's so sweet, I love her. I think she's the sweetest damn lady Like. Oh my gosh.
Speaker 5:I just told y'all 10,000. We ain't giving no discount. She is so sweet.
Speaker 2:You're a JW North alumni. You're good, you're good.
Speaker 4:I'm going to answer this question, but I don't have children, so don't nobody come for me in the comments because I don't have kids, because I hate when people tell me I don't. So there is a huge difference in parenting nowadays. With the amount of entitlement of today's youth and their blatantly disrespectful Should we go back to old school parenting, yes, yes. Or is there a gentle, or is you trying to beat your kids? Gentle parenting does not work. Or is gentle? Well, hold on. Does gentle parenting work and or? Or parenting work and or or? Does we need to incorporate consistency with the gentle? Degenerate whoop that ass.
Speaker 2:I answered that go ahead. I'm a psych major, so I got a different.
Speaker 4:I got a different opinion.
Speaker 5:I'm a psych major, so I don't.
Speaker 4:I don't, honestly. I think that we were fucking abused for real. For real we were. I don't think I was abused cool. I think every asshole I got I deserve that's cool. Uh, I don't think so. I think I think gentle parenting can work. Um, if you're consistent with it from the beginning, like you can't set your kid with a tone you be beating ass. And now you just all of a sudden want to be gentle because that's not going to work, because now they're accustomed to discipline being this way. Also we're expected. We can't expect for little ass kids to be able to function as adults. They're learning. So I don't think beating ass is, but I don't have children that are on my nerves every day. Also, the one that's in my house is quiet you do my stepson is very quiet, so he's very chill.
Speaker 4:We ain't got to say nothing to him twice, and so I guess I just been blessed with the opportunity to be able to be a part of a gentling parent situation. But I don't think you need to be chill when I have children. I won't be hitting them.
Speaker 5:I will say this I do think that kids today are a lot softer than we were and I attribute most of that, especially when it comes to my daughters, because she's in a different environment than I was.
Speaker 5:I was in an environment where I had to be tough, I had to stand up for myself because I had cousins fucking with me, I had people on the block fucking with me.
Speaker 5:So I had to be tough, I had to be outspoken, I had to speak my mind because again, I couldn't go home and say shit because why you tell, tell him, because my ass, be at home for not doing shit out there in the street. So I don't think necessarily that we need to go back to that, because I do understand that it's a, it's a generation where, at least for the way we parent, is that we try to explain to her the why things are the way they are now and we're not saying we she ain't never been popped or none of that, because there are things that require that but it's extreme. Now she's not getting nowhere close to what I was getting, but we try to make it to a point to where she understands the mentality behind the consequences. So we always tell her that in life you always have a choice and every choice has a consequence. So if you make this choice, be prepared for the consequence. And that's all I ask her.
Speaker 2:So a question I have for everyone at the table Do you get any kind of PTSD when you hear a belt pop?
Speaker 4:Yeah, no, hell yeah.
Speaker 2:I get triggered memories. I do too. I do too.
Speaker 5:I don't because a normal belt is not going to do it, because I got whooped by an old retirement belt that was like a half inch thick leather. So if I get, if I see three sticks laying next to each other, I might, I might, you know.
Speaker 2:You ever cry for the belt?
Speaker 5:No that would have made it worse.
Speaker 4:Yeah, no.
Speaker 2:Do you ever get used to the beatings and then pretend? And they realize that you were lying like you're pretending to cry Never been there.
Speaker 5:No, I try to. No, I was a great actor towards the end.
Speaker 4:I can see where me being hit as a child has made me in my adult life not and yelled at as a child for everything, made me not really know how to handle pressure situations. If you yell at me I'm going to panic because I'm used to being yelled at.
Speaker 5:I didn't say damn Damn what you gonna panic.
Speaker 2:Did you take that as a yell? I did.
Speaker 3:But but going by what you were saying, I honestly think that fear is more important than anything. Your kids have to have a natural fear of you because, like I don't, brooklyn has been spanked I put my hands on her before, but it's not often. It's for the major things where it's like dang, you didn't hear my tone she's more tone trained than anything where if I say, hey, I need you to do something, and she claps back. I'm like this is what we're doing. Like you heard what I just said. But because kids are more soft today, I feel like you don't necessarily have to beat on them like we used to be hitting stuff, but I definitely think that they have to have a defined fear of us that hey, if I do this, I know I'm going to get in trouble, because, unfortunately, because kids are so privileged today with technology and everything else, they don't understand the importance of earning what they get. They think it's supposed to be given to them.
Speaker 5:And to that point I will say that what I had to learn is that there's a difference between mom tone and dad tone.
Speaker 5:Yes, absolutely so my daughter does have a healthy fear of me, because when I turn it up and she get my man voice she, she, she stops in her tracks like, oh, dad, serious, I better. I better adjust my attitude right now because I'm not going to like how this is going. She understands that and she understands that we, she, she. Now she's in a situation where she understands that she has to earn everything. She gets Nothing, nothing's giving to you. The only thing I'm required to do is make sure you have somewhere to lay your head and food in your stomach. Yep.
Speaker 1:And you only have to give. She know that, kevin, you're deep in thought, bro, I'm not, I'm just. I don't know tequila, I don't know, I'm just because I'm still like learning. So what the fuck do? I know we got two little kids you learn one so you got experience each one's different, each one's way different you know what I mean, so but we can't say one way is one way, and then we said another way is another, but you got one gangster though she is, but she's, but she's not too.
Speaker 5:So cute In the same way.
Speaker 1:But she's in that stage of pushing the line. She's my favorite. You know what I mean. So sometimes certain things don't work and sometimes certain things do work. So it's just a balance of figuring out who the fuck your kid is and going off of their personality. That's what we used to not do.
Speaker 3:The crazy thing to add to what you're saying. As they get older, it gets more intense, because the one thing that we, as parents, forget is that our kids have feelings.
Speaker 5:Well, they're people.
Speaker 3:Well, they are, and I say that just because I've had to learn how to skirt around, because Brooklyn's going to be 13 and she's in middle school, seeing a bunch of different things that we were not exposed to, like I took her phone back in November and have not given it back, and so many parents are like, oh my gosh, you can't stay connected. She didn't, she lost it, she lost her privilege. But you do have to understand your child and that who they are, the struggles that they're dealing with daily, cause the world is not like it was when we were in middle school. It is not and it's it's just insane, because I always tell her you have big feelings, I have big feelings too. You cry. I cry If you need time to yourself, but the biggest thing is just making sure you talk to your kids. Yes, communication, you have to, because I know it's the wildest thing, but we've already had conversations about sex and she's 12.
Speaker 5:No, that shit ain't wild. That's not wild at all.
Speaker 3:Well, kids are having sex in the bathroom at her school.
Speaker 3:You got to be kidding that as well and kids are going behind the park and doing this thing and everything else. And the biggest thing that I can tell her, as I always tell her, I prefer you don't do that, but if you feel like this is something you do, you need to come to me. You want your kids to be able to come to you, but if you're so stuck on beating that ass all the time to put your authoritative boots, you're not going to get what you need for them to come to you to feel comfortable, because they're going to be too scared and they're going to go find another source.
Speaker 5:And that's the hard balance, because you have to be a place of support and authority at the same time. Facts and those are two conflicting movements at the same time, because you have to understand, like we. We it's really hard, but we do our best to explain things to my child, which really goes against every completely I was raised, ain't no goddamn explanation.
Speaker 5:I said nigga, sit your ass down. You sit your ass down. I don't have to explain why I told you to do something. But in my, in my journey as a father, I try to explain to her. So when and sometimes I I still do the old school shit I just sit back and watch. And when she hurt herself, I'm saying now let's talk about why you hurt yourself and let's talk about what I told you previously to avoid this. So we do try to have the conversations and I think for us I know it has worked. Tell us everything. It's ridiculous. Sometimes she don't shut that up.
Speaker 3:Sometimes she over tells but you want that, but you want that. No, I'll tell your mama. But no, that it's just wild, because today's world is not like it was back in the day. It is not, and you have to prepare your kids Because they came back in. You ain't lying. What grade is she in? She's in seventhth. She goes to University Heights on University.
Speaker 4:Yes, yeah, I was bad at uni. I ain't gonna lie.
Speaker 5:I was on the. When did you stop being mad? That's the question. That's my next question.
Speaker 4:I actually was a very good kid. I started being bad at uni we talking, dominique?
Speaker 5:I don't believe none of these.
Speaker 4:Dominique was the bad one.
Speaker 2:I don't believe that. So you ratted on her. Yeah, that's what she did. She was a rat.
Speaker 4:Oh, I knew you was a rat. Because only once, only one time, did I and I wasn't ratting on her. My mom was trying to spank her and she was running around the couch and my mom was chasing her and I got tired of my mama trying to catch her breath, so I stick my foot out and tripped her ass to be late for work. Dominique was eight. I was 18. I had a good-ass job. I was going to be late for my job.
Speaker 2:And you're the adult.
Speaker 4:Whoop her ass, mama, so we can go. Let's fucking go, because this is ridiculous. I'm ready to fucking go.
Speaker 5:Dominique, if you want to jump her.
Speaker 2:I'll help you. If you want to come on the show and air her out, you're more than welcome.
Speaker 4:I'll tell you my own shit. I was mad as fucking UD, but I had interpersonal things going on that should not have happened to a child and I was going to school and taking it out on the kids. So it wasn't that I was just.
Speaker 5:That's why you mean to me, I got it.
Speaker 4:I'm not mean to you. I'm so loving to you. I really am.
Speaker 2:She's mean to me.
Speaker 4:She cussed me out when we first started. What?
Speaker 2:pull up the evidence.
Speaker 4:I ain't never been mean to you.
Speaker 2:It's the beginning of the episode.
Speaker 4:I ain't never been mean to you. You always been my favorite we're on the tape wrong with? That you told me to shut up cause you needed to stop. I needed you to put your. I didn't want to just deny it in a minute at the same time go ahead and ask one of these and then I'm gonna ask because these are the last four where nobody else is duplicated okay sean, why are today's women so picky when it comes to where men take them on dates?
Speaker 4:we're not, we're not you picking picky bitches. Um, the bitch who said she didn't want to go to the cheesecake factory should have been at mcdonald's. I don't even know why the fuck she got her ass on the internet talking like that. I mean I hope she see this. Shit. Man, you ain't even that damn cute now.
Speaker 4:Your little outfit you had on was cute and you was put together, but to be thinking that you need to be at somebody five star restaurant, no, I don't think that women are picky. I think women have been neglected, and some women, not all because I I want to be. If I'm into you and I'm interested, I want to be where you at. I don't give a damn where it's at, if we at mcdonald's, if we at the park, if we in the car, if we, I just want to be where you at. I just want to be vibing, talking to you, getting to know you, bonding period, don't give a fuck where it's at. But I think women are neglected a lot. It's very much um dates and things are put on the back burner a lot. I'll see you at the corner of my eye, a nigga, and I'm gonna let you know that shit right now okay I can see you.
Speaker 4:Thank you, that's you this nigga I feel like I feel like dates and things are put on the back burner. And then women, some women, when they tell them, oh, stand up for yourself and say this is what you want. They just go over the fuck board and they need to sit the fuck down. I don't think women really care. Where dates are she lying?
Speaker 2:I'm gonna I'm gonna take a note from Dave Chappelle here. Right, oh man, what's that? You remember the killing them softly here? Right, oh man, what's that? You remember the Killing them Softly stand-up? Right, of course, is that a fucking baby? Remember the whole statement when he was like is chivalry dead? And he was like, yes, chivalry is dead. Woman fucked it up how.
Speaker 1:They don't tell you to listen.
Speaker 2:I feel like women, the women that are being misrepresented by their fellow woman online. So, if if, is it Sean, is that a question you may feel? You, too, may feel that this is not the case, but there's a lot of women representing you, saying that this is the case that Sean is now being subject to, because they are influenced by Is Sean a man or a woman?
Speaker 4:It's a man and I can respect what you're saying. We are being misrepresented.
Speaker 2:You're being misrepresented by the representation of what is the norm now. So like when he goes online, or even the women that go online and watch that and go yeah, that's how we should act are now going into the world, giving that energy towards the men that are trying to date them. So you might want to check the woman, because I do think women are now becoming in that belief not all women, but there are certain women that have that belief that are now going into the world.
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Speaker 2:I agree.
Speaker 4:I agree. And women y'all do got to stop hopping online and saying this outlandish that shit is stupid like it's stupid as shit like you. Money has nothing to do with how you vibing with somebody, if that energy is there yeah, it doesn't, though?
Speaker 2:I'm just saying for me for me as a woman, in this statement, you two are the minority, but now the women are starting to believe what they're seeing online and now they're going into the world representing that Women need to get online more. And say it because I honestly feel like.
Speaker 4:I can buy money with anybody, I can have more money than you. It doesn't really matter, it's not about that. Are we vibing? Are we meshing? Well, is your conversation good? Are you making me laugh? Are you making me smile? That's how I feel about it. Well, I would rather sit down and have a McChicken, and I'm such a love the cheesecake fence.
Speaker 3:I do too, but it's unfortunate because there's that stigma attached. You have women over here that use men for their money and you have women over here that want to be with a man who has no money. So you get a happy medium, but unfortunately the stereotypical part of women in today's society is it is and again, if a woman is not secure within herself to know what she wants from a man, then she's going to go the route of take me to Fleming's instead of take me to the Cheesecake Factory.
Speaker 4:My thing is, Cheesecake Factory gives you free bread, fleming's doesn't Girl, and that crusted chicken, romano, at the damn Cheesecake Factory that shit is fiery if you get a crusted chicken Romano that's nice, but don't do that it is.
Speaker 5:She said, you get free bread. And then if somebody?
Speaker 1:said I'm taking you to Fleming's, you do. I'm not going to get free bread sticks, no.
Speaker 3:But you misunderstood. Don't give me no options. I'm not saying that going to Fleming's is a bad thing, but that should not. You should not turn down a date and having someone's time if they want to take you there. I'm not saying it's these niggas' fault.
Speaker 1:Nobody want to say that it's a lot of niggas taking a bunch of bum-ass bitches that don't deserve to go to these places and they think that's the standard. So now these bum-ass bitches are saying this and then it's like well, you taking this bum of this. Why the fuck?
Speaker 4:I gotta go to applebee's chili and you made that because I ain't never heard you call nobody no, bum ass bitch so you made that shit from the spirit, because I ain't never heard you call now this nigg. Call somebody a bum ass bitch, maybe you.
Speaker 1:I ain't never heard nobody well, there's a bunch of bum ass bitches getting good dinners, and that's that's not fair.
Speaker 3:So yeah, spot on, spot on.
Speaker 4:So bottom line. If you want to go on a date, we it doesn't matter, we like to do sky fact, yes, talk, talk. First figure out who you're talking to yeah, definitely figure out who you're talking to.
Speaker 5:I just think it's levels for now. I don't. Yeah, I'm not. I'm taking you to Starbucks first and I agree with that.
Speaker 4:I agree with that. You should not have to go broke. That's still $4.
Speaker 1:I was about to say I'm about to go to the mom and pop homie.
Speaker 2:I agree with you, we're still getting an understanding of who we are towards each other no Monday night, the $1 night.
Speaker 1:I agree with that.
Speaker 4:You shouldn't have to go broke just to show a bitch that you're interested in her period, point blank.
Speaker 2:I'm not going broke and I don't know you. You're still trying to figure out what's on the flip side.
Speaker 4:I also need the niggas who don't have gold to stop calling bitches gold diggers. If they don't have gold to dig, no one's digging for you so that shit is just ridiculous.
Speaker 5:I'm gonna say, if I take you to the swimming, pool.
Speaker 1:Don't say my name before I do. What did you say?
Speaker 2:don't do that that was a little awkward that was a little awkward, false, hey, kevin if Fleming's is attached, it come with Dick hey, fleming, kevin, yeah he said it we ain't gonna never be at Victoria Gardens at the same time if we going anywhere.
Speaker 5:Yep he said if you, we ain't gonna never be at Victoria Gardens at the same time If we going anywhere with white tablecloth.
Speaker 2:Is that Marissa over there? Oh yeah, At the end of the night. It's gonna be some.
Speaker 4:It's gonna be, it's some. He finna hand out some ding-a-ling.
Speaker 2:Go buy wires in the bathroom. How's the night going?
Speaker 1:You know you're getting some dick tonight, right? That's a skit, homie. That's a skit, I like it.
Speaker 4:That is a fire, ass skit, I tell you. A la carte mean buff that ass open.
Speaker 5:That's what that mean. That's what that mean. That's what that mean.
Speaker 4:So, basically, sean, if you take a bitch to a nice place, it's a la carte. You need to make sure that you are prepared to hand out some dick that evening.
Speaker 1:Just don't make it rapey, but don't, don't just do it to hand up, because you're gonna set this. You know, bum ass bitches, don't do it, alright. One more right. She said three more. All this is we can just. We can just, all right. One more right she said three more.
Speaker 4:Oh, that's just one. We can do this last one. We can do three more, we can do three, we can do eight. Natasha wants to know why are black men and black women always beefing in front of company?
Speaker 1:I heard her voice when she said that she want to know why Beefing in front of company I can explain this because I know her, so I know what she has she talking about like couples, couples.
Speaker 5:Yeah, that's what I want to know.
Speaker 4:No, she want to know why the fuck are we always on the goddamn internet talking shit to each other and about each other? I can tell you that because I know her.
Speaker 5:For their own internet doing it because it gets views and likes and they're getting paid off being seen on the internet. But the majority of black people I know are not in front of people going off at each other.
Speaker 4:No, I don't know any black people, so ask yourself why you in these type of circles. She ain't. She ain't Because I know her. She's not in this type of circle, but obviously we see this coming down our timeline and honestly I think a lot of times we're pitted against each other.
Speaker 5:I mean groomed taught by definition.
Speaker 4:It's not a, it's not a rapey term. I I don't mean rapey, I don't um I would I understand.
Speaker 5:What you're saying is that we're not gonna say, we're not gonna say all, but we there's not all there is a portion of the black community that are not taught how to behave within one another exactly, exactly and people need to understand that your silence is the is the loudest you can ever be.
Speaker 4:Absolutely, and I also think that, because it's so expected of us, people wait like please don't get it twisted. White people is at home fighting with their white ass husbands too but they just ain't on the internet, yeah. It's behind closed doors. Yeah, it's behind closed doors. I guess they have a different level of respect for each other to where they don't even put their business out there in a street like that.
Speaker 1:We've seen enough Reddits to know yeah, yes.
Speaker 5:You just signed the video for them.
Speaker 1:The shitty part is don't this go back to what we was talking about the hood and all that shit?
Speaker 2:where it's just like.
Speaker 1:Oh well, then shut the fuck up, put that shit in the closed doors, like you said.
Speaker 4:Yeah, it definitely needs to be. We need to go back to a place of respect for each other, period, period, across the board friendships, relationships. We need to handle our business and learn how to better communicate, but behind closed doors.
Speaker 5:I agree, definitely I agree. But to communicate better, people got to take accountability.
Speaker 4:Absolutely Accountability is the name of the game.
Speaker 5:Accountability is one of the things that people dodge.
Speaker 4:Yeah, it's the name of the game.
Speaker 5:They'll show up with audacity before they show up with accountability.
Speaker 4:A fistful of it, baby. But I agree, I definitely agree. Accountability has to be the first staple in communicating properly, because now you have to be like, okay, what part did I take in us getting here?
Speaker 5:You are Never mind.
Speaker 1:Yeah, what? Nigga Nothing. I know what he's saying, but it's nothing. It's cool, it's not bad.
Speaker 2:First off, you attack the Muppets. It's not bad, it's not bad.
Speaker 4:One day y'all gonna admit that your girl got swag you cut them off at the foot. Please, please, get you another big bitch to get up on this show. That's swagger than me. How much time you got.
Speaker 2:Call somebody nigga.
Speaker 4:I got plenty of time Call somebody nigga there, get the Care Bear, stare, call somebody nigga Call for I can't.
Speaker 5:I got plenty of time.
Speaker 1:Call somebody, nigga, there was a Care Bear stare involved what you talking about, and then you sent me a picture of a.
Speaker 4:Care Bear. I'm not going to let that slide because I ain't got to see you since you sent me the picture of the Care Bear.
Speaker 1:That was Ava's Care Bear it she fucked that care bear up.
Speaker 5:I ain't gonna, I'm not gonna lie. When I saw it I said oh bless her heart she tried.
Speaker 4:I need you listeners out there. If y'all like how your girl get down with her swag, please let let the niggas know, because they hate you don't even know.
Speaker 5:Validation comes from within.
Speaker 4:I don't need it, I don't already tell you who I am.
Speaker 5:I don't already tell you how cool I am.
Speaker 4:I don't need it, stop asking for it.
Speaker 5:It comes to me. Y'all be like oh my god, look at her shoes.
Speaker 4:Niggas, be like oh my god, can you make me some? Nigga every time we just think it's funny.
Speaker 2:I like to laugh. All of you know I like to laugh. I'm not saying that you don't have. I hate the word sweat, I'm not saying to laugh. I hate the word to laugh. So the fact that I don't think it's bad. I just think it's funny that they look like Muppets.
Speaker 1:Prince wore a blouse in a basketball game.
Speaker 5:Game.
Speaker 1:Blouses, swag still right, I think.
Speaker 4:We're going to talk about Prince, because Prince can put your bitch heels on right now and fuck your bitch in her heels.
Speaker 5:I was saying Prince is the only nigga that can tuck his Well if he did that.
Speaker 1:Then we did a seance.
Speaker 5:Prince is the only nigga that can tuck his leggings in his boots and still get your woman.
Speaker 4:And get your bitch. Yes.
Speaker 1:And he can steal your bitch. We got, we got period.
Speaker 4:Maybe I'm just morbid Period and I'ma wanna see it all no he can't.
Speaker 1:If he doing that, I'ma leave him.
Speaker 3:This.
Speaker 4:This is a good one, we have two more, y'all.
Speaker 3:Go ahead, Marcus. How can you start to break the generational curse and plant a seed of change and actually see results?
Speaker 5:Do right, you start with yourself and you teach your children yeah.
Speaker 4:Yep, yep, it trickles down.
Speaker 2:So Marcus had two, it's.
Speaker 4:Marcus.
Speaker 2:Marcus had two. Could it have changed one of them? Like Marquise, I feel like you have more people given no, no, him and Candace were together.
Speaker 1:Like you said, it starts with you.
Speaker 2:Change her name to Candice. A little bit more variety in there.
Speaker 5:You said that shit, I thought about Anabese. I went straight to Oz, I went to the fucking.
Speaker 1:Game of Thrones, and this is shit I be dealing with. About Eta Bici, I will trade the eyes, eta Bici.
Speaker 4:I went to the fucking Game of Thrones and it's the shit I be dealing with Some more variety. I be missing you sometimes. What's the shit I be?
Speaker 5:doing. The next question is from Eta Bici. I be sitting here like.
Speaker 1:I don't even know what the fuck is Eta Bici.
Speaker 2:I don't even know what Oz is. We should listen to Killshot.
Speaker 5:No, we're not doing that.
Speaker 4:So yes, marcus, to answer your question, you do need to start with yourself. Also, I think we need to stop looking to the people who gave us the generational curses for healing. Them niggas ain't healed. They ain't going to do nothing, but keep on bringing you back to where the fuck you're trying to get away from. I think we need to stop turning to them for the healing and looking for them to fulfill those voids that they left in us. Fill them voids ourselves and then make sure that we're not giving it to our children and passing it down to them and be happy doing right, doing it the right way.
Speaker 4:Doing it the right way, make it look good, don't have to be like I'm just trying to get by.
Speaker 2:I'm doing it. Legitimately, that's why I wear braids.
Speaker 5:Sometimes I'm like nigga, I can just sell one kilo. Why One kilo?
Speaker 3:I'll be good. Okay, so you don't have to be a generous.
Speaker 4:Okay, okay, okay. What's the last question? Y'all stressing me out because you wearing braids, because your daddy wear afro and you over here trying to sell a kilo, leave me alone.
Speaker 2:You just said, to break the generational curses.
Speaker 4:I did it and did and did. This is anonymous. Question um bullshit.
Speaker 1:It's an anonymous you wrote it, we know she didn't want me to say her name oh, I thought you wrote it, he's like anonymous. I know the answer to the motherfucking question.
Speaker 4:This is how do you allow someone to come in and love you correctly when you have had a relationship full of betrayal?
Speaker 2:I'm going to tell you yeah, you go ahead. Who was that? By Des.
Speaker 4:No, this ain't by me, this ain't by me. I don't need no answers like that Dukes didn't hurt me what you mean deuce didn't hurt me what you mean?
Speaker 2:no, I'm talking about just to add to love correctly.
Speaker 4:Call me, show up. I'm kidding, I'm kidding, um, no, I and I. I have an answer for this and I do. You have an answer. A female did ask this, so maybe take this really quick. Okay, go ahead girl. Yeah, you do, child, okay, go for it. Um, I would say that you need to heal yourself first before you even allow somebody in to try to come in to love you correctly. Now, I'm a firm believer that you, you can heal yourself within the relationship that you are trying to leave, um, but once you feel like those previous issues aren't bothering you no more, then you should be able to go ahead and let somebody else. If you still are saying I'm scared, and you know I'm scared, they're gonna do me like the last person. You still hurting from the last person. So heal from that shit first and then go ahead and move to the next I kind of agree with that, yeah that's how I feel be open, honest.
Speaker 1:Yeah, definitely, yeah, definitely. Open, honest, because it could take a long time to heal everything. You might not be fully healed, but you might fall. But at least, when you fall, be honest.
Speaker 2:Don't let somebody be like, oh well, it's like they need to know too, that's nice Because, yeah, because you could be going into something new and you don't want to necessarily be like wait on me, figure it out. Let me figure it out before we start it. It's like hey, just understand, I'm dealing with some shit On that journey I'm going to have some stumbles.
Speaker 4:Yeah, definitely I agree, just basically self-healing, deal with that first and then go from there, definitely, so you don't take anything from the past.
Speaker 1:He just wanted to get some pound cake.
Speaker 4:Oh, y'all want me to answer Me too. Did she make some? Yeah, can I?
Speaker 5:answer yeah, of course. No, that's mine. I'm trying to pound cake too.
Speaker 4:You're going to pound cake too. I would say you said Are you trying to pound some cake?
Speaker 5:You just got that, get it. You just got that Giddy.
Speaker 4:I'm a rapper. Can you read it one more time? Yes, the anonymous person wants to know how do you allow someone to come in and love you correctly when all you've had in your relationships are relationships full of betrayal?
Speaker 5:Okay. So I would first say that you have to once again learn how to love yourself, because you cannot expect someone to love you to the point to fill the void you can't fill within yourself. So I feel like the first thing you have to do is understand and realize where you fall short in loving yourself. So you got to do so, you got to do work with yourself. Second thing I would say is that when you go into the new situation, you cannot bring the baggage from the past with you.
Speaker 5:New situation you cannot bring the baggage from the past with you. You cannot let that person come in in a deficit and expect them to be more and repair what the last person has done. You have to take that new person as a new experience, as a new beginning. But you cannot fully do that holding on from things from the past. So you have to go forward with a clean slate, being fully physically and mentally healed from your past traumas, and go and walk into that new situation, a new relationship, in full faith, in full effort and full content in your heart with who you are going forward.
Speaker 4:Absolutely, absolutely. And although I do believe that self-love is definitely the very first component, try to tell yourself hey, you get this right with the right person. Their love could even make you blossom even further. Don't be afraid to love again. It's going to be okay, girl.
Speaker 2:And then you get to have your cakes pound.
Speaker 1:And eat it too.
Speaker 4:I'm sorry girl.
Speaker 5:I'm also going to say you have to. If you've had a series of betrayals, you have to take accountability and look at yourself and ask yourself why are you picking the same type of man over and over?
Speaker 4:again. You definitely got to type.
Speaker 5:You definitely got to type because maybe your type don't fit what you need.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and types don't necessarily just fall into race either. You could date everybody under the sun, and they'll still have certain aspects and personality traits that are very similar, so you can be like oh well, he's black, he's white. Trust me, there's a trend going on and you might just want to identify the trend of what draws you to all of them. Regardless and race doesn't change types Types are a type.
Speaker 4:Definitely. I agree. I had that same issue. That's a topic for another episode but I was able to identify exactly why what type I was picking and exactly why I was picking that type, and that actually helped me a lot.
Speaker 5:So definitely identify why you are still picking that same type of dude and find somebody that that challenges your trauma, not let you fall into it yes, come through, maurice.
Speaker 4:That was a. He get on my nerve y'all, but he be coming through sometime. Anybody else got anything I ain't got nothing, I just said. At the end of the rainbow you'll get your pounds cake okay, alright, so that's all the questions we have for you guys today. This has been another episode of the heavyweight podcast yay, yay make sure you like, subscribe, share, comment, comment. All that shit, all of that shit there. Thank you for joining us. Bye till next time, peace, peace, comment, comment. All that shit, all of that shit there.
Speaker 4:Thank you for joining us.
Speaker 5:Bye till next time peace, peace that's a wrap, y'all.
Speaker 1:That's. That's how she rap, so make sure to click like subscribe. Tune in we on the Austrian platform. So until next time well, I like.
